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Being married to a very dedicated Scientologist, Tom Cruise, and having a child with him has put Katie Holmes in a somewhat specific position when it comes to raising her daughter, Suri. Ultimately, that whole situation was one of the reasons why she decided to file for divorce and to request the sole custody of her and Tom’s child. One of the main reasons for that was the so-called disconnection policy that could result in her daughter turning against her, like how Nicole Kidman and Tom Cruise’s children turned against their mother.

In 2012, after Katie Holmes officially divorced Tom Cruise, she was granted the primary custody of Suri. According to her, all she really wanted was to create a stable and safe environment for her daughter and the only way to do it at her own terms was to get her away from the Church of Scientology members who used to be pretty involved in their lives during her marriage to Cruise. So instead of following the strict and pretty specific rules one must follow when raising the child a Scientologist, Kate has developed her own set of rules for her daughter Suri to follow. So let’s take a look at 15 Katie’s unique parenting rules she makes her daughter follow.

A New Father Figure

Since Suri has been growing up without her father in the picture basically from the moment Katie decided to leave Tom, she didn’t have a father figure in her life for some time. However, it appears that things have changed when Katie started dating Jamie Foxx and his and Suri’s relationship has grown stronger over the years. According to Katie, she is very grateful that Foxx has been in their lives and that he has become a father figure for little Suri and, even though this relationship can’t really fill the hole in Suri’s heart, it has made Suri’s growing up a lot easier. It appears that the two get along really well and Suri’s has gotten used to the fact that her father isn’t a part of her life at the moment.

Keeping Suri Away From The Spotlight

Suri has been in the spotlight from the moment she was born, especially once all of the drama with the divorce started and when people tried to figure out why Katie demanded a sole custody of her daughter. However, when things blew over a little bit, Katie finally got a chance to keep her daughter away from the spotlight and she has been doing that ever since. She wants her daughter to have a normal childhood like all other kids and, above all, she wants to provide a stable environment for Suri to grow up in. Avoiding all of the drama as much as possible is definitely one of the ways to do just that and to keep your child happy and keep them as innocent as possible. So far, Katie has been doing a pretty good job in that aspect.

Strong Girls Become Strong Women

One of the most important lessons Katie Holmes tries to pass on to her daughter is that it is important to grow up to be a strong and independent person. She teaches Suri all about the gender equality and the importance of it, and she wants her daughter to be a strong little girl that will eventually grow up to become a strong woman. According to Holmes, her daughter is the most important person in her life and, even though she realizes that Suri is growing up really fast, she wants to make sure that she will also grow upright. Being a single mother must surely be hard from time to time but it helps Katie prove her point and lead by example when it comes to explaining to Suri why every woman needs to be strong.

Suri Has Her Own Drivers

Whenever Suri feels like leaving her house and going basically anywhere, she has a number of drivers at her disposal who have to take her wherever she wants to go – no questions asked. Of course, she is allowed to go without Kate, but her nanny and her bodyguard have to be present. So if Suri feels like taking a trip to the nearest bakery or to her favorite park, all she has to do is just ask. The limits, when it comes to the destinations she visits, are little to none. Yes, she has to stay safe so no risky places are on the list of the locations she can visit by herself, but with the exception of those, the world is pretty much her oyster if she gets bored inside her home.

Suri Can Go Shopping Whenever She Wants

If Suri wants to go shopping, she can go whenever and wherever she wants to. She has a nanny and a personal bodyguard who have to accompany her wherever she goes, and she has a number of personal drivers to make sure she gets safely from one place to another— and Suri knows how to use it. What girl doesn’t like shopping? If Suri feels like buying some new clothes, toys, or any other kind of goodies, she can go and buy whatever she wants. Katie has always been treating her daughter like a tiny little adult so she is allowed to make her own decisions when it comes to buying new stuff. There is probably some limit to the money she is allowed to spend, but that limit is definitely not low.

Suri Picks Her Own Clothes

One of the parenting methods Katie Holmes decided to keep after leaving the Church of Scientology treating her daughter like an adult. All kids growing up Scientologists are treated that way and they are allowed to make their own decisions when it comes to a lot of things, from picking their own clothes to deciding which food they want and which they don’t want to eat. Even though Katie has made it very clear that she doesn’t want her daughter to be a part of the Church of Scientology, she is still sticking to some of those rules and she allows Suri to pick all the clothes she wants to wear and she can also shop for her clothes all by herself. Luckily, it seems that little Suri already has a pretty great sense of fashion and style.

Raise Good Humans

When asked about the most important thing about parenting, Katie said that everybody should make sure they are raising good humans. She is trying to teach her daughter all about human rights, integrity, important values, gender equality, independence, confidence, and kindness towards other people. According to Kate, people often get too caught up with their jobs without even realizing how quickly their children are actually growing up so she wants to make sure that she is always there for her daughter and that her daughter knows that the family always comes first. She also believes that it’s the small things that count so she tries to do small acts of kindness with her daughter on a daily basis, for example, helping out the homeless to help her daughter realize how important it is to stay humble.

Listen To Your Kids’ Opinions

Katie Holmes believes that it is very important to listen to your children and really hear what they have to say because it will help you understand them better, as well as understand their needs and their likes and dislikes. If you want to be the best possible parent to your kids, first, you need to understand their personality and accept them for what they truly are, and then, you can help them develop a good set of values and become the best people they can possibly be. Katie believes that it is crucial that Suri knows she can talk to her about anything openly and that she can express her opinions freely and with confidence. Kate encourages her to always share her thoughts out loud and to discuss anything she feels needs to be discussed.

Reward Your Kids For Their Hard Work

According to Katie, it is very important to teach your kids the importance of working towards a goal and to always reward them for their hard work no matter the outcome. For example, if Suri had been studying really hard for one of her tests, yet she didn’t get a perfect grade, Katie will still reward her for all the hard work she put into that. She believes this is something that keeps the children motivated and they don’t get discouraged easily if the things don’t always go as planned. She wants Suri to be passionate about the things she does and to always work towards some kind of a goal, no matter how small that goal might be. The good working discipline is something that can be taught from a very early age and it doesn’t necessarily require a lot of pressure.

Have Fun With Your Kids

Katie Holmes tries not only to be a great mom to her daughter Suri but also her best friend. She believes that it is very important to have as much fun with your kids as you possibly can. The parenting isn’t only about the discipline and about making sure that your kids are following your distinctive set of rules, but it is also about spending quality time with them and simply enjoy each other. Katie loves doing things like baking cookies with her daughter, watching movies together, throwing their little private parties, for example, the little Oscar-themed party the two had at their home at the night of the Academy Awards, and so on. The two also love playing all kinds of games together, taking walks, visiting the park, etc. All in all, they seem like a very happy mother/daughter duo.

Know When To Say “No”

According to Katie Holmes, it is very important to learn how to say “no” to your kids from time to time, especially when your kid is throwing tantrums. Yes, Katie really does respect her daughter’s opinions and she wants to know what Suri wants and what she doesn’t, she also allows Suri to do her own shopping, but that doesn’t mean Katie doesn’t know when to put her foot down. There is a difference between raising an independent person and raising a spoiled one, and Katie knows how important the difference between the two is. At this point, Suri is well-aware that there are things she simply shouldn’t do, like making scenes in public, because it won’t get her anywhere anyway and it will definitely not help her get what she wants. Once Katie says "no," it really is a "no."

React Calmly When A Child Is Injured

Every kid gets injured from time to time, especially if they play outside and with other kids, but not every parent reacts the same way once something like this happens. And while some parents get in a sort of a state of panic when something happens to their children, no matter how small an insignificant the injury is, Katie has a completely different approach in those situations. She believes that by remaining calm, you actually calm down your kid as well. It makes sense when you think about it. When the child sees or even senses that the parent is really scared or nervous, it makes it harder for them to deal with their injury because it just adds to the level of stress they are already experiencing. Not panicking is truly sometimes the best thing you can do.

Don’t Hold Your Kids Back

Katie Holmes believes that every child should be encouraged to find their own path in life and to discover the things they are passionate about on their own. And while it is sometimes really hard for a parent to simply let the kids do their own thing, according to Katie, one of the worst things a parent can do is hold their kids back, which doesn't allow them to follow their own dreams or discover their own talents. Katie admits that the thought of Suri growing up so fast makes her sad from time to time, but when you are a parent, you simply need to deal with the fact that your kids won’t be by your side forever and you really need to let go and never hold them back in any way.

Respect Your Children

According to Katie Holmes, one of the most important parts of every parent-child relationship is mutual respect. You need to respect your children in order to teach them the importance of the respect and that will lead to your kids respecting you as well. Being a good parent isn’t about having your children fear you because that can lead to developing a whole set of negative emotions and issues later in life. If you want a harmonious life with your children, you have to have a healthy relationship with them that will result in them having healthy relationships with other people as well as they grow older. Since Katie is a single mom, she has developed a strong bond with her daughter and she believes it is very important that Suri feels safe and loved even though her dad isn’t a part of her life anymore.

Tom Cruise Probably Has To Keep A Distance

People have been wondering for quite some time now if Tom Cruise actually gets to see his daughter Suri and the answer is no. Katie Holmes was granted a sole custody of their daughter and she definitely wanted to keep her daughter away from the Church of Scientology, but she didn’t actually forbid Tom from seeing his daughter. However, it appears that he chooses not to. The last time Suri and Tom were publicly seen together was four years ago and the insider revealed that he doesn’t see her privately either. The reason might be the fact that Katie has been labeled as a “suppressive person” once she decided to leave the Church so Tom has to keep a distance from her and from Suri as well. Katie chooses not to bring him up too much to make things easier for her daughter.

Sources: people.com, madeformums.com, babyology.com.au, today.com, abcnews.go.com, dailymail.co.uk, lifeandstyle.com